


Frail doll

by Yu_Kagami



Series: Haikyuu Angst oneshots/twoshots (Lets torture Hinata) [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abused Hinata Shouyou, Abused Nishinoya Yuu, Angst, Cutting, Depressed Hinata Shouyou, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Incest, Karasuno, Murder Idealism, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychopathology & Sociopathy, Sad, Sibling Incest, Sociopath Hinata Shouyou, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, in the past though, no one actually dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:53:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25895491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yu_Kagami/pseuds/Yu_Kagami
Summary: Hinata Shouyou's past got out somehow and everyone is gossiping about it, people avoids him and treats him like glass, can Nishinoya Yuu, another abused child help fix him?
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Nishinoya Yuu
Series: Haikyuu Angst oneshots/twoshots (Lets torture Hinata) [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1859377
Comments: 8
Kudos: 174





	Frail doll

**Author's Note:**

> As usual, trigger warnings in tags. Read it at your own risk.

“I heard he cuts himself.”

“I heard that he tried to kill himself on campus.”

“I heard that his mother was abusive.”

“I heard that he was raped by his brother.”

Murmurs of unfortunate gossip flowed alongside Shouyou as he walked down the hallway, none of his friends greeted him today, none of the Karasuno team members reached out to him today, none of the teachers dared to call him out today.

Everyone was walking on eggshells on him, it was as if he was a sacred piece of glass that could break in just a tiny touch. It would be a lie if Shouyou said he didn’t expect this outcome, his secrets had somehow spreaded across the school, his past was revealed out to everyone by force, he felt so exposed, ashamed, sad, miserable, he just wanted to die.

Nobody was helping him, everyone else just joined in laughable gossiping, his friends turned their backs onto him, his partner that swore he would make him invincible wouldn’t even look at him, the usual annoying side comments were silent today, everything around him changed and things became worse than it once was.

Shouyou could feel the millions of judgemental gazes on him as he pushed open the classroom door, he didn’t greet anyone nor did he care that his scars were on display. Murmurs arose again, this time more irritating than it was before. It was indescribably frustrating to have everyone in the room talking about him and having nobody brave enough to just ask a single question to solve the mystery.

He wanted to die with every assumption made about him.

He thought about jumping in front of the train when he walked here.

He thought about jumping off the bridge when he was riding to school.

He thought about hanging himself when he saw ropes were being sold.

Now, he wanted to jump out of the window and hopefully snap his neck in the process. 

The usually bearable presence of people was suffocating today, it was as if the knives that danced around him in paranoia before was finally stabbing him deep today. Shouyou put on his headphones to cancel out the annoying muttering of his dumb classmates, he slumped down onto his neck, burying himself into his scarred arms. He took a glance at the window, fantasizing himself flying across the vast sky, dropping down to the ground, taking in the world’s view as he fell, the horror struck expressions of his beloved ‘friends’, the traumatized hearts of his teammates.

As he was lost in the fun of imagination, he spotted his captain who was chatting with none other than his vice captain, somehow to scene irritated him, he wanted to tore apart their limbs and yell all his misfortune in their faces, he wanted to see that regret filled face, he wanted to watch those tears of grief running down their expression as he slaughter every friend of them in front of their locked down bodies, he wanted them to experience how helpless and bare he felt right now.

It would be nice if he could start a fire and lock everyone in the school and watch everyone burn in vain, he could almost imagine their blood curdling screams as they beg for mercy in the hands of rising flames. 

Shouyou sighed exasperatedly, even if it was a nice thought, he will never be brave enough to actually act on any of his fantasies anyways, it was just another impossible dream of his, nothing new. 

The orange haired boy yawned tiredly and found himself a comfortable place in his arms to rest his head, he was drifting off to the soothing melody played in his headphones before an unexpected pat on his shoulder startled him away from his relaxing posture, before him stood his senior, Nishinoya Yuu, the libero smiled and said something he couldn’t hear, Shouyou felt delightful that someone was actually willing to talk to him, he immediately took off his headphones and attentively listened to his Senior’s words.

“Shouyou lets go to the roof!”

Nishinoya suggested carefreely, putting on his signature cheesy smile as he held out a hand as if telling Shouyou to hold it. 

“Sure!”

Shouyou gladly took his hand and the short duo made their way to the roof, ignoring the bell for class and chatting normally as they walked up.

“Wahh! This is the first time I skipped class!”

Shouyou exclaimed childishly as he felt the summer breeze caressing his soft orange locks carelessly, creating a cool air despite the burning temperature today.

The shorter male before him took a short glance back at Shouyou before focusing on the scenery under him again. Shouyou tilted his head at the unusual silence of the rowdy libero.   
Hesitantly, Shouyou attempted to start a conversation again.

“Noya-senpai? Why did you bring me here?”

Nishinoya looked back at the now confused younger boy. He started the words he wanted to deliver in an unusually serious tone, bluntly, he stated.

“I heard the rumours.”

Shouyou immediately shut off after those words, all the expectations he had built up earlier shattered into pieces and his smile drifted off his face as his expression morphed back into the ghastly facade he had been wearing, however before he could retort or say anything in return, Nishinoya started again.

“I am not going to deny that I brought you up here to talk about it.”

Shouyou looked down and bit his lips until the dry skin of his chapped lips were dug out as tiny droplets of blood formed a net of crimson.

“But I am not here to pity you either.”

The middle blocker’s eyes widened upon that line, he was filled with disbelief, suddenly the dark mood he has casted ever since his senior spoke for the first time when he brought him up the roof was clearing up bit by bit.

“I don’t understand anything you have been through, nor do I understand what it is like to be pitied and treated like glass.”

Shouyou slowly fixed his eyes onto the back of Nishinoya, sunlight shone brightly as the afternoon sun was hung up in the middle of the sky, sending radiant beams one after another, creating a dark shadow behind Nishinoya that shielded Shouyou from the painful burns of the heated light.

“But what I understand is the feeling of being abused and treated like dirt.”

It felt unreal that someone as brave and fearless as Nishinoya had once been in his vulnerable position. Though it was probably rational though since every strong person probably has a tough backstory behind all their courage.

“I have never told this story to anyone but my therapist. It is hard to be strong especially when everyone around you is a constant reminder of how weak you can be.”

Shoyou flinched at the harsher use of vocabulary, yet it was a truth he couldn’t deny, it was almost scary how much Nishinoya was able to accurately speak his feelings out and read his actions completely.

“Things can be scary now, things might look like they will never get better, it might be painful to see everyone betraying you.”

He clenched his fists tight, licking off the blood that formed on his pale lips earlier, his vision blurred in a familiar way, he was trembling ever so slightly, and strangely the whole ordeal was sort of comforting in a psychopathic way.

“But it is okay, it _will_ get better, people aren’t betraying you, they only act like this because humans are naturally scared of things that are unfamiliar.”

Shouyou couldn’t help but wonder if that is true, it would be nice if it was, he really wanted to trust his senior, however he knew better than anyone that he shouldn't get his hopes up, only disappointment awaits after all.

“People are only avoiding because they don’t know what to do, which is okay, it isn’t their fault, you have to forgive them, talk it out with them and everything will be fine again.”

Shouyou twitched his eyebrows in doubt and distrust, however his senior suddenly turned around, startling Shouyou a bit as he took a step behind by instincts, the older male smiled gently and approached Shouyou slowly as he spoke again.

“Trust me, everything will be okay, Shouyou, we will make it together, it will be alright.”

Shouyou wanted to break down right there and sob his emotions out, but he remained a neutral expression, not fazing a single bit as he blinked away the forming tears, Nishinoya pulled him into a warm hug, it was filled with love unlike the lusty ones he would get before.

Shouyou allowed himself to lean into the gentle touch and Nishinoya smiled.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------

“The rumours are true and I won’t deny that.”

Pitiful looks were sent in his direction, even Tsukishima looked softer than usual, Kageyama wore off his usual angry frown and Shouyou felt anger rose to his chest as soon as he saw their pathetic faces.

“My mother was abusive, _was_ , which means I am fine now, my brother did rape me, but it was in the past too, I _did_ tried to kill myself on campus but I am on anti depressants at the moment and I am fucking _trying_ my best to recover, so please don’t look at me like some broken piece of fucking glass, I am not fucking frail.”

More concerned gaze were on him and Shouyou glared at every single one of his teammates, wanting to lash out right there and rip their fucking shitty looks of sorrow off their dumb faces. As anger was slowly taking control, he felt a reassuring pat on his shoulder. 

Nishinoya and Shouyou exchanged looks as Nishinoya took over his speech after the nod of approval given by Shouyou.”

“Shouyou is trying his best, I don’t think pasts define how you should treat someone, if it is Shouyou’s wish to be treated normally, if he thinks he can handle it, then we should go along, I don’t think any of you would like to be treated as expensive glass of royalty either.”

A major part of the team looked unsure and unconvinced, Nishinoya knew they probably wouldn’t believe him with the hesitance they are clearly surfacing. He hissed in annoyance and cut off the protests before they could even start.

“What do you think of me? Am I brave or am I weak?”

The team exchanged confused looks before Asahi spoke up cowardly.

“Nishinoya, you are really brave and there is no way you are weak.”

All others nodded in agreement and Tanaka even chipped in a side comment of his own.

“Yeah Noya-san! You are so manly there is no way you can be considered weak!”

Everyone nodded again and they all fixed their gaze on Nishinoya as he spoke up.

“This so called brave person in front of you was abused too, this so called manly person in front of you was once suicidal too.”

Even if there wasn’t gasps of shock or surprised comments, anyone with a bit of sanity can feel the astonishment in the air, it didn’t haunt Nishinoya in the slightest, he didn’t avoid eye contact, he didn’t run away, he looked up confidently and announced his next line with absolute courage.

“You said it yourselves, that I am strong, that I ain’t weak, why would that be different if my past is suddenly revealed? I am still Nishinoya Yuu, I am still the libero that is the guardian of the team, same with Shouyou, he is still the middle blocker with limitless potential, he is still one of the miracle first years with abilities to lead us to nationals, still the _greatest decoy_.”

Everyone left silent when Nishinoya stopped talking, Nishinoya elbowed Shouyou slightly when he had finished his speech, the orange haired boy, looked up to him and grinned happily, even if words weren’t exchanged, Nishinoya could feel the gratitude the other boy was sending towards him, and so Nishinoya beamed back at the slightly taller male, both of them sharing a prideful moment of their own.

_Clap.. clap clap._

Faint clapping broke through the suffocating tension, and the grinning pair snapped their attention to the source of the sound, and to their surprise, the one who was clapping was none other than Kageyama, Shouyou smiled wider, it seemed like his- no, their message has successfully been delivered.

It didn’t take long for the others to join in the lonely clapping as well and soon enough everyone was cheering and laughing together again, Shouyou also huffed out a laugh of his own.

The pair left both of their past behind forever that day, and neither have ever been happier.


End file.
